


We'll be okay. I promise.

by definetlynotaturtle



Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Adoption, F/F, Oops, accidental angst, there wasnt supposed to be, theres angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:53:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23790379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/definetlynotaturtle/pseuds/definetlynotaturtle
Summary: oops.I was always bothered that you can't do anything for Ionas daughter and all you can do is see her begging in the alienage, so i decided to do something about it. There wasn't supposed to angst. It just kinda... happened. My bad. So, how'd I do?
Relationships: Female Cousland/Leliana (Dragon Age), Leliana/Warden (Dragon Age)
Kudos: 20





	We'll be okay. I promise.

The tree hasn’t been touched. No scorch marks, no tears in the bark from stray blows, no broken branches dangling at the top. No marks or blemishes whatsoever. There should have been. But Elissa was glad that there wasn’t, as were the locals she assumed. Hard to imagine that it had been less than two months since she was battling darkspawn here. Less than a hundred paces from where she was now. Less than a hundred paces from where axes, swords, arrows, fire, lightning, ice, monstrous beasts, rocks as large as people, blood, and corpses were thrown and formed piles taller than Sten. Less than a hundred paces from where this tree stood nearly two hundred darkspawn were slaughtered as they were pushed back from the gate. The tree should have been marred by the battle that had waged so near it.

“Are you sure you want to do this? There are other ways to help. And other places to go.”

The melodic orlesian tones pull her from her thoughts as she turns from the tree to the speaker. Leliana. As beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. Worrying for her despite how she personally must feel returning here. _What did I do to deserve you?_ “No, I’m not. But I feel I must. And besides we both said we wanted a family.” _Now that mines gone._

“You know I do, but I worry for you. I just want you to be happy, my love.” She steps closer pulling the taller woman into a tight embrace. “There was nothing you could do my love. You must stop torturing yourself.”

_If only it were that easy._ “I know. But I can do this.” She pulls away just far enough to place a chaste kiss against her lips. “Thank you. For being here.” They both pretend to not notice the tear that falls down her cheek. Palming her cheek, she brings their foreheads together. “Always.” How did she ever deserve this amazing woman in her life? “let us go. It’s already late as is. I doubt they will be appreciative if we bother them any later.”

Making a hum of agreement she takes Lelianas hand and leads them through the dark slums that the elves call home. Using what little light the moon and stars provide to make her way to the house she wants. The few people out leave them be, recognizing the armor she wears under her hooded cloak. The emblem on the breastplate alone enough for the cautious elves to leave the ‘shemlen’ in their home alone. One man even kneels as she walks by. She can’t bring herself to look at him.

They reach the door they are looking for. In a dark corner of the square, within sight of the gate that leads to the commercial district of Denerim. Light peaks out from under the door as she raises her hand to knock. She stands there, at the door for what seems an eternity, hand raised but never moving. Can she do this? Does she have the right to? Would she cause more harm than good? Will she fail her again? _I already ruined her life once. Perhaps this was a terrible idea._

As if sensing her lovers’ thoughts Leliana grabs her arm and hugs it to her chest. “I am here for you chere. No matter what you decide.” Calming the hammering in her chest she knocks on the door. Three loud thuds, far louder than she intended, rattle the door on its hinges. She’s scared it would fall to the floor. A sigh of relief can be heard as the door opens and a slender elf woman with hair just a shade darker than Lelianas greets them.

“You had better have a good reason for…” Her voice tapers off as she realizes who was standing outside.

Clearing her throat awkwardly “Hello Shianni. I’m not sure if you remember me but I’m Elissa and this is Leliana. We were here some months ago and were hoping to speak to Cyrion about something he had helped us with.” Shianni is still gawking at them, clearly not expecting to see either of them again. Showing no sign that she had heard a word that was just said to her.

“Is Cyrion home?” Lelianas question manages to get through to the shocked woman.

“Yeah, yeah. Um… Wait here and I’ll go get him. Alright. Alright.” She closes the door before either can respond. Clearly uncomfortable with the situation. But given that two humans, one of which is a noble, showing up at her door in the middle of the night unannounced neither woman could blame her. Especially not after they had heard the stories of the alienage’s residents when they first visited.

The door opens again to reveal a slender elderly man with dark grey hair, gaunt features, and tired grey eyes. “Warden hello. We weren’t expecting you. Please come in.” He moves to the side, holding the door open and motioning for them to enter. 

“Thank you. I apologize for the trouble. This was a… last minute decision.” _Not a complete lie_.

“No. It’s no trouble at all. What can I do for you?” He shifts his feet as he asks the question. _You already know why I’m here_. He’s scared of the answer he knows is coming. “I wanted to speak to Amethyne. If you would be so kind as to wake her.”

“Of course.” Resignation. The voice of a man too used to being powerless. Too used to being unable to stop any wrongs from being done. A man who had spent his entire life living in fear and doing everything he can to still be a good person. A man who despite everything he had seen had willing accepted the child into his home. Merely because she had asked him to.

He reenters the room with Shianni and a small child holding his hand as she rubs the sleep out of her eyes. Another adult elf watching them from the doorway with fear and trepidation in his eyes. Cyrions son? It didn’t matter in the end. They weren’t here to talk to him.

Cyrion places Amethyne in a chair and kneels before her. “I’m sorry to wake you so late young one but these two ladies need to talk to you. Don’t worry we’ll be right outside. If you feel scared or just want to go back to sleep just let us know and we’ll-“

“That won’t be necessary. I think it would be best if you all remained here for this. I think it will make Amethyne more comfortable as well.” A sense of relief washes over all four of the homes inhabitants. Grateful that they wouldn’t have to leave the scared child alone with two strangers.

Kneeling next to the chair Elissa brings herself face to face with her for the first time. Guilt and fear and hopefulness all mixing within her as she prepares her thoughts. Desperately hoping that nobody can tell what a mess she is. “Hi, Amethyne. My name is Elissa. That woman behind me is Leliana. We wanted to talk to you about something.”

“What?” Sleep was still present in her eyes. The poor girl struggling to remain awake as the strange woman spoke to her.

 _Moment of truth…_ “About your mother, Iona.” The girl picks up at this. Sleep rapidly being replaced by youthful hope. Hope that they were here to take her to her mother. That they would be together again. That they could be a family once more. Elissa wished she was.

“You see; I was a friend of your mothers.” Yet another half-truth. “And I know she wishes she could be here. But she can’t. I’m afraid that when highever was attacked your mother was…” She can’t bring herself to finish the sentence. Came all this way to try and help and you can’t even finish a damned sentence! _Weak. Pathetic. Coward. How could you ever help her? You can’t even talk to her._

“Your mother was taken to sit with the Maker. Where she knows no pain nor troubles. And she watches you with love and pride in her eyes.” _Leliana. Always knowing what to say. Always saving me. I don’t deserve you_.

“Yes.” Choking back the tears that threaten to spill forth she turns to the deflated child. Now openly crying, knees pressed to her chest as she hugs them close, curling in on herself, as she learns her mother wasn’t coming back. She may not understand all that was said but she knew enough. That her mother was gone. And she was alone. “Yes, she is. But I want to ask you something, Amethyne.”

“Wat” Snot falls from her nose as tears flow freely from red puffy eyes.

“I wanted to ask you a favor.” Being helpful. Knowing you are helping others. It helped her in her mourning. _I hope it works for you. And I hope I can help you._ “I wanted to ask if you would like to come with me and Leliana. We have our own house. With books, a garden, forest as far as the eye can see, and even a nug.” Sad eyes rise to meet hers. Her crying not stopping but slowing. _It’s better than I was hoping for anyway._ “There are horses too. If you would like to learn how to ride them. We could teach you. We could teach you a great many things. Horseback riding, gardening, weaving, singing, reading. Do you know how to read?” A small shake of her head. “We could teach you. But only if you want us too.” A small smile sits on her lips as she looks at the young girl. _Please. Please. Say yes. Please._

The rest of the room inhabitants had been silent. Watching the exchange intently without uttering a word. The room is silent save for Amethynes sniffling as she tries to calm down. For several minutes the room stands still as if a single sound would cause the world to collapse. To the surprise of all its Shianni who breaks the silence that was permeating the air. “I think you should go with them.” Every head in the room turns to her, all equally surprised at her proclamation. The young girls heart breaks as the woman she had come to rely on and admire was telling her to leave. _First mama and now Shia. Doesn’t anyone want me?_

“Shia?” Her lips quiver as her crying threatens to resume “Don’t you want me? You” SNIFF “said” Sniff “that you-” Every heart in the room breaks as she tries to ask the question. Too young to realize that she did nothing wrong.

She rushes to her side desperate to calm the child, who had already endured so much. “It’s not that little one. It’s not that at all. Of course I want you. I love having you here. But these two can take care of you. They can teach you things we can’t. You will have a better life with them than you could ever have here.” _I don’t want you to suffer like we do._ “We will still be here. And you can come back if you want. I’m sure that Eilssa and Leliana would be more than willing to bring you back if you want. Wouldn’t you?”

“Of course.”

“If that is what she wanted.”

“See? Now, what do you say? Amethyne?”

She doesn’t respond with words, too tired from the nights’ events, and simply nods her consent. Elissa releases a breath she hadn’t realize she was holding. Tension leaving her body as she braces against a nearby wall. “Le- Amethyne, would you be willing to show Leliana to you room, so she can help you with your things?”

Recognizing that she needed to speak to their wards caretakers, THEIR WARD, she grabbed the young girls hand. “Hello, Amethyne. I’m Leliana. Why don’t we go get your things hmmm?” Leading her out away from the main room back the way she had come from.

As soon as they were out of sight Elissa turns to those left. “Thank you for taking care of her. I’m sorry if there was trouble. Was the gold enough to cover the expenses? Do you need mo-“

“No we don’t.” Shianni cuts through the air. “We don’t need anything.” The anger in her voice apparent. Elissa doesn’t miss the pleading look Cyrion sends her way.

“I apologize for Shianni, warden. She is… hot blooded.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. None of you do.” Leliana returns with a small bag. Amethyne holding her hand as she tries to remain awake. They walk to the door together, Leliana and Amethyne walking into the night before her. Elissa turns back at the threshold. “I ask that you not tell anyone that we were here. We would prefer to our activities… private.”

“Of course, warden.”

Turning half away before turning back. “One last thing. You might hear some… strange things in the coming days. Just know that Amethyne is safe. And we will do everything to make her happy. And… Thank you. Just thank you.”

Turning away as the door closes behind her she joins Leliana in the darkness. They look at each other, full of love, pride, and hope for their future. Dropping to a knee she brings herself eye to eye with Amethyne. “Are you tired?” A sleepy little nod brings a smile to her face. “Come on.” She picks the child up in her arms. Easily holding the small girl with one arm as she rests her head on her shoulder. “Sleep.”

Soft snores are heard emanating from the young girl. Already asleep as Leliana gives them what must be the softest smile Elissa had ever seen. “Come my love.” She takes her hand as she throws the bag over her shoulder “We need to get to the horses.”

She lets herself be pulled away. Soon they will be gone. Alone. With no wardens, no politics, no game, no Ferelden, no anything. Just her, Leliana, and Amethyne. A feeling of affection Elissa had never experienced before wells in her as she carries the young girl. The young girl she was already starting to think of as their daughter. And hopefully, on day, she will think as herself as such too. As the horses come into view outside the walls of Denerim the feeling of trepidation she expected didn’t come. No fear or regret. Just joy.

Within a matter of hours knews will break that the Hero of Ferelden has disappeared. But by then they will already be gone. In their home, far from any who might recognize her with her love and their… daughter. And for the first time in a long time Elissa Cousland thinks that things might just be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> oops.
> 
> I was always bothered that you can't do anything for Ionas daughter and all you can do is see her begging in the alienage, so i decided to do something about it. There wasn't supposed to angst. It just kinda... happened. My bad. So, how'd I do?


End file.
